It still amazes me as to how much power a six-letter word has. It has so much power that it controls self- esteems, emphasizes insecurities, creates unrealistic ideals, breaks. But it also has so much power that it builds, empowers and encourages self-love.
I think it is safe to say that the latter is not the most prominent effect of the word beauty. I do not even know how one defines such, nor do I know what exactly it is meant to entail.
We throw the word beautiful around every day, but do we ever throw it back to ourselves?[if gte vml 1]><v:shapetype id="_x0000_t75" coordsize="21600,21600" o:spt="75" o:preferrelative="t" path="m@4@5l@4@11@9@11@9@5xe" filled="f" stroked="f"> <v:stroke joinstyle="miter"></v:stroke> <v:formulas> <v:f eqn="if lineDrawn pixelLineWidth 0"></v:f> <v:f eqn="sum @0 1 0"></v:f> <v:f eqn="sum 0 0 @1"></v:f> <v:f eqn="prod @2 1 2"></v:f> <v:f eqn="prod @3 21600 pixelWidth"></v:f> <v:f eqn="prod @3 21600 pixelHeight"></v:f> <v:f eqn="sum @0 0 1"></v:f> <v:f eqn="prod @6 1 2"></v:f> <v:f eqn="prod @7 21600 pixelWidth"></v:f> <v:f eqn="sum @8 21600 0"></v:f> <v:f eqn="prod @7 21600 pixelHeight"></v:f> <v:f eqn="sum @10 21600 0"></v:f> </v:formulas> <v:path o:extrusionok="f" gradientshapeok="t" o:connecttype="rect"></v:path> <o:lock v:ext="edit" aspectratio="t"></o:lock> </v:shapetype><v:shape id="officeArt_x0020_object" o:spid="_x0000_s1026" type="#_x0000_t75" style='position:absolute;margin-left:-.5pt;margin-top:31.15pt; width:247.9pt;height:245.55pt;z-index:251659264;visibility:visible; mso-wrap-style:square;mso-wrap-distance-left:12pt;mso-wrap-distance-top:12pt; mso-wrap-distance-right:12pt;mso-wrap-distance-bottom:12pt; mso-position-horizontal:absolute;mso-position-horizontal-relative:margin; mso-position-vertical:absolute;mso-position-vertical-relative:line' wrapcoords="0 0 21600 0 21600 21600 0 21600 0 0" strokeweight="1pt"> <v:stroke miterlimit="4"></v:stroke> <v:imagedata src="file:///C:/Users/USER1~1/AppData/Local/Temp/msohtmlclip1/01/clip_image001.jpg" o:title=""></v:imagedata> <w:wrap type="through" anchorx="margin" anchory="line"></w:wrap> </v:shape><![endif][if !vml][endif]
Being a black Womxn in a society that says black Womxn need to do abcdefg in order to be deemed worthy- it's tough. I mean constantly being told in various ways that "if only you were lighter skin" or "maybe you should make your hair longer" or "I'd totally date you if you weren't black" - yes folks, these words have been uttered to me throughout my life time- and to be honest I'm tired.
I'm tired of society and its nonsense.
I'm tired of how we give people so much power to determine how we feel about ourselves at any given moment.
I'm tired of being told that I do not fit the standard.
I'm tired of there being a goddamn standard in the first place.
I'm tired of being told to love myself and then being made to feel the opposite.
I'm tired of seeing little girls aspiring to be anything else but themselves.
I'm tired of being that little girl.
I'm tired of how cruel and soul breaking we can be as human beings.
I'm tired of how our souls, our intelligence, our depth, our everything else is never taken into account.
I'm tired of my beauty being defined by my exterior.
I'm tired of a lot of things.
But I am not tired of loving myself. Unapologetically. And I will continue to do so.
That for me is beauty - the ability to love yourself regardless of the standards, ideals and unbelievable judgements of society.
So, the next time someone asks you what beauty is - all you have to say is "ME". Beauty is me.